Smartasses of the world unite!!

Generally a smartass and believer in the Twainism that Against the assualt of laughter, nothing can stand. Mission: mock bigotry, narcisism, and ignorance. This is a collection of thoughts on baseball, politics, economics, and occasional other things.

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Monday, January 30, 2012

Newt's George to the Tea Party's Lenny

I got it. It finally came to me. Lenny from Of Mice And Men - that's the tea party. Cling to the vision of what should be, even though we all know it's not gonna happen.

"Tell me about the Constitution George."
"Well Lenny. It's this perfect and thing that if we allowed the govermint to do only what it says, and not a mite more then ever-thing'll be fine."
"But they'll keep there hand off'n our health care right George?"
"That's right Lenny. We''ll make sure the govermint keeps their stinkin mitts off'n our Medicare."
"And our Social Security too George. Tell em 'bout the Social Security."
"Ponzi scheme right Lenny?" George laughs a little
"Yeah George. P-p-ponzi."
"We ain't never gonna see't. So's we may as well jus let the bankers invest it fer us. They's the one's that know best. The govermint made all make them loans to poor folks. Hell. Everone know govermint can't do nuthin' cept army, and make banks give bad loans out."
"That's right George. Gov'mint caint do nuthin."
"Yep. That's why the Consitution don' let the govmint do nothin' cept make laws, mint money, levy taxes."


That's right. The Tea Party equals the dumb guy in Of Mice And Men, and Newt is playing those dopes. Just promising what it's-a gonna be.

Oh Gov. Walker.......

Is there a deficit, or isn't there a deficit?

I know there are different ways accounting works. There's a cash basis, but you said that you would use GAAP (generally accepted accounting principles) on the campaign trail. Maybe this is splitting hairs, but why boast that you've done what you said you'd do in balancing the budget. Then again, Gov. Doyle balanced the budget on a cash accounting. This leads me to conclude that you are basically the same kind of Governor with a different initial in front of your name. And that makes me think nothing really will change with you in Madison except your constituency will get the benefit of your patronage, as opposed to others getting benefit were the Governor to have a D in front of his name.

I am of the opinion that most people vote their "brand," and that means that election are less about issues, and more about marketing. That's pretty sad. Calling you a liar would be cynical, and I won't because I don't think that you are. What I will say is that you are really just more of the same with an R in front of your name.

I know this. Now teachers can't bargain for working conditions - like class size, and other things that affect education beyond what they are paid. That's kind of important. When people want to improve crime, they ask the thoughts of police. Now we don't want the same input from teachers? Really?

How will the budget be balanced next fiscal year without federal stimulus dollars?

So Gov. Walker, you're really not much more than another Scott McCallum who "balanced" the budget by cashing out the tobacco settlement in 2000. Another one time lump sum, as if there will be a pile from which to draw. You brag of making the hard choices, but you haven't really. You've done the politically expedient, while looking tough since you've earned a sizable constituency that will write letters, and call in to radio exalting your toughness.

You're really just another politician who spends more time fund raising as opposed to governing. What tough choices await you next budget when there will not be a pile of money to use? What services will be cut? What donors will be the benefactors of your patronage?

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Newt Gingrich - Asspipe of Liberty

Newt Gingrich is an asspipe. Not because he's a Republican, but because he's a arrogant hypocrite.

Just yesterday, January 17th, he called on candidates Rick Santorum, and Rick Perry to drop out. Now, maybe he's jealous that "Rick" is a cooler name than "Newt." And, really it is a cooler name. C'mon, "Newt?" Really? Maybe he thinks that the election should be between dudes with odd first names (Newt, Mitt, and Barack) Whatever the reason, Newt finished behind Rick Santorum in Iowa, and New Hampshire. That's kinda like the Packers insisting that the Giants get out of the way so they can get to the Super Bowl - kinda. Unfortunately, political primaries are not a playoff, and people can stay in the game even though they lost - twice.

In the last debate he was asked by Juan Williams about his statement: “I will go to the NAACP convention, and tell the African-American community why they should demand paychecks instead of food stamps,” and how it could be offensive to black Americans. Newt dodged the question and instead asserted that capitalism is not racist. Never mind that the question had nothing to do with capitalism per se, and more about how accusing black Americans as being satisfied with food stamps might be offensive. Nevermind that 60% of people receiving food stamps are white. Not only did he dodge the question, he then got all douchey on Juan Williams for even asking it.

It's a well established fact that as Newt led the charge on the Clinton impeachment for lying about an affair.............while having an affair on his 2nd wife.....whom he had an affair with while in his 1st marriage.

Newt also received $1.6 million from Freddie Mac, and Fannie Mae, the government sponsored entities well known for their role in the housing market. He was a "historian." As an "historian" Newt was able to praise their business model, and AFTER the financial meltdown, he was able to say he warned them about its problems. Of course that means he is brilliant, and a corrupt douche.

Well done Newton Leroy Gingrich - Asspipe of Liberty

Monday, January 16, 2012

Reflections on MLK



Martin Luther King Jr. said a lot of things - a LOT of things. The "I Have A Dream Speech" remains the his most enduring words associated to him, but on the day commemorating his legacy it's important to remember that he said many things that are just as important, if not as widely celebrated.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."
Our greatest achievements have almost always come as a result of outsiders breaking exiting paradigms. Whether it was Steve Jobs taking an artists perspective to technology, or Galileo defying Rome to say that Copernicus was right and Earth was not the center of the universe.

"Almost always, the creative, dedicated minority Has made the world better."
Jazz, blue, rock-n-roll, hip hop, punk all had beginnings outside of the mainstream society. As did roots of the Renaissance, Cubism, and Surreal movements in art.

"An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to broader concerns of humanity."
Isn't this the central lesson of Jesus Christ? It is also 100% contrary to the Randian Objectivism. Yet another reason to reject that line of reason.

"We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love."
Love, not the romantic type, is what binds us, and what we have in common must trump that which would divide us. Only love can conquer hate King also said.

"Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism, or in the darkness of destructive selfishness."
You have to live for your family and community. You cannot find purpose only living for yourself.

"A riot at the bottom is the language of the unheard."
This pretty much explains itself. Look in any history book. Look up The Boxer Rebellion. Look up the French Revolution. It's what happens.

"Don't let anyone make you think that God chose America as his divine messianic force to be a sort of policeman of the whole world. I can hear God saying to America 'You are too arrogant, and if you don't change your ways I will rise up and break the backbone of your power, and I will place it in the hands of a nation that doesn't even know my name.'"
Empires throughout time have proclaimed divine providence. Rome did. England did. Are we really different?

"I speak as a citizen of the world for the world as it stands aghast at the path we have taken. I speak as an American to the leaders of my own nation. The great initiative in this war is ours. The initiative to stop it must be ours."
We have to decide to take the correct path for the sake of all. None have the authority to choose for us, and none have the power to force our path, but we are compelled to make the most just choice.

“A nation that continues year after year to spend more money on military defense than on programs of social uplift is approaching spiritual doom.”
Government is a tool created by people. It too must be put to work for the betterment of all - from the least the the greatest.

"What is needed is a realization that power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic. Power at its best is love implementing the demands of justice. And justice at its best is power correcting everything that stands against love."
Jimi Hendrix once said “When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”

My personal favorite: "I have the audacity to believe that peoples everywhere can have three meals a day for their bodies, education and culture for their minds, and dignity, equality and freedom for their spirits."

Martin Luther King Jr. was a revolutionary man. he understood the revolutionary power of love and hope, and that they must be brought to bear for the betterment of us all, because it they don't the the unheard may turn to the power of hate. The legacy of Martin Luther King Jr. is not only that we all be judged by the "content of our character," but that we are bound together as brother and sister under the Creator. We are the community of man and we are here to love each other, and to implement the tools, and ideas we have developed to the betterment of all of us. Among these tools are scientific discovery, technological advance, economic development, and they must work for the betterment of all. To what degree betterment we are free to debate, but one can hardly look at the world today and say the benefits of our advances are widely, and justly shared.

That's not to say we have failed, but that there is much to do, and a great distance to go. That's all to easy to lose on a day we don't get mail.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The douchebaggery of politics

This is not a statement on the GOP. This is not a critique of capitalism. Nor is it a criticism of Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich. It is absolutely laughable that GOP candidates in the primary season have come to be critical of Mitt Romney's former company, Bain Capital.

Bain is a private equity firm. This type of company first became prominence in the 1980s. They purchase public companies that they assess are undervalued. Usually by taking loans using the company they are purchasing as collateral. Then the company is streamlined, and costs are cut. Costs are usually people who work there. Labor is the greatest cost of most companies - so this also is not a labor rant. Once costs are cut, then the companies are made public again with the equity firm taking the profits of the stock sale. It's capitalism. Not illegal. The ethics can be debated too. We can also debate whether it's the "right" kind of capitalism, but again not the point. Newt says there's a difference between people like Bill Gates and Steve Jobs who make things, and people like Mitt Romney who buy something, slice and dice it and then sell it to others. Then again there's nothing in Newt's record where he champions legislation to hinder takeovers, or foster environments for those who "make things" like Jobs and Gates.

I guess the douchiness of this all really is, if Bain Capital is bad for capitalism as Gingrich, Perry, and others all said as part of their campaigning, do any of these people running for the GOP nomination intend to champion policies that will rein in this type of business? I have to say no. They all favor less regulation overall, especially in the finance sector (you know, the one that was at the center of the meltdown in 08, and heretofore has not had any meaningful reform put into practice). None of them are in favor of restoring the Glass-Steagal separation of commercial, and investmant banks. They talk about the blight about shattered families, and communities when people are laid off, but they don't propose anything that will improve, even temporarily the situaltion of the laid off people, like education, retraining, unemployment insurance.

If you believe in free, unfettered capitalism, that's fine. Then don't be a hypocrite and say you're on the side of the laid off middle classers because it's politically convenient when there's a history of public postitions you've taken that have fostered the environment under which firms like Bain Capital have flourished.

What you're really doing is showing us all how full of shit you really are.

Monday, January 9, 2012

I'm gonna tell you why the BCS sucks

The BCS sucks. The championship game sucks. The various bowl committee selections of teams for the non championship bowls suck. The weekly release of the BCS standings sucks too. All season long, the BCS sucks. It sucks donkey. It's sucks because it will never provide what fans want, and find most compelling. It will never provide drama on the field.

It will never provide 16th seed Princeton nearly shocking top ranked Georgetown in the opening round of the 1989 Men's Basketball Tournament. It will never give us an 8th seeded Villanova playing miles above ability to shock heavy favorite Georgetown in the 1985 basketball finals. We'll never get teams from the bottom half of the bracket playing into the sweet 16. We'll never get a loaded team underachieving and laying an egg in a tournament. We don't have a tournament. We get months of computer rankings combined with polls, combined with mathematical modifiers for "quality wins." We get bunk.

It'll never give that level of drama because in a meaningful game we are stuck with #1 vs. #2. Fans don't want that. Unless they're chanting "Roll Tide" of "Geaux Tigers," they don't. Fans want #9 Wisconsin, or #13 Michigan, or #16 TCU shocking the football world and advancing in a playoff. We want Nick Saban after a "shocking loss" throwing out all the cliches to ESPN's talking head sideline reporter because #8 Arkansas just upset the 2nd ranked Crimson Tide (I know football and basketball are not the same but #8 taking #1 in national rankings is mathematically similar to a #2 seed knocking off a #1 seed.)

I mean, really, how often in the men's basketball tournament are the final 4 all #1 seeds? It's only happened once. Regularly teams seeded 4th or lower advance to the Final Four. How sucky would the basketball championships be if it was a 4 team tournament? I'll tell you. It would TOTALLY suck. Then, if you were a fan of a team in the top 16, and got to "enjoy" your team's postseason in a 4 team playoff where none of the participants had the chance to advance further, well that would suck too. The Butler Bulldogs were a #8 seed, and made it to the national finals last year. They lost to UConn - a #3 seed ranked nationally between 9 and 12 before the tournament started.

This years' championship game has been determined for a long time now. Where's the drama? Could Oregon have made a run? How about West Virginia, or Stanford, or Michigan, or Wisconsin?It's been Alabama/LSU for what seems forever. We don't watch sports to see the teams the experts tell us are the best. We watch our teams play, and when they're eliminated we pick the compelling story - the Butlers, and Villanovas. Then, when they're eliminated, we feel good about LSU/Alabama, because we got the drama. That's what we wanted the whole time.