Smartasses of the world unite!!

Generally a smartass and believer in the Twainism that Against the assualt of laughter, nothing can stand. Mission: mock bigotry, narcisism, and ignorance. This is a collection of thoughts on baseball, politics, economics, and occasional other things.

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Friday, July 11, 2014

Just make Mexico a state already.....

Big dealing on the border with Mexico lately. It's all over the news. California, Arizona, New Mexico and Texas all border Mexico. That's a long border. Plenty of places for illegal immigrants to leak in through. "Build a fence!!" they say. "They" being those native to these parts - descendants of European immigrants.


I have a solution. Just make Mexico a state. It's pretty big, it might make like 3 or 4, but make one bigger than Texas. I can't stand Texas. Buncha cowboy dipshits. Texas BBQ sucks anyway. Everyone knows Kentucky and Tennessee have better BBQ. Mexican chili is better too. That should be all American now, and the best American chili will be in the state of Mexico. Suck it Texas.

Compare the border of Mexico/USA and Mexico/Guatemala/Belize border. It's like less than 1/3. Fuck it. Close that smaller one. Shit, imagine the savings when the border patrol, and customs bureaucracies shrink with the shorter border to the south. You won't need a passport to take vacation to all inclusive resorts like Punta Cana (never been, but just wanted to say "Punta Cana" great name). Also, hillbilly racists will have to drive all the way to Guatemala to demonstrate. All that money spent boosting the local Mexican - ahem AMERICAN - economy. Also, look at all that beachfront. Develop THAT baby! Lastly, and the anti-soccer pinheads won't care, but the USA will have, like, THE BEST team for World Cup in 2020 if we can get this done by then.

Mexicans become American. They don't need to sneak over the border for a better paying job because minimum wage in Mexico will jump to almost double. "American" corporations can't relocate across the border to get cheaper labor, and more lenient environmental oversight thus disincentiveizing (is that a word? It is now.) shuttering US plants. Fuck you Ford, GM, and Del Monte.

You're welcome America.


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